ROSEVILLE, Minnesota – After offering Marie Lambeau as a pre-order bonus for The Investigators of Arkham Horror two years ago, FFG was thrilled this month to finally release Marie Lambeau as an investigator in a totally different game.

“We know how patiently members of our community have been waiting for Marie Lambeau to be released,” said John Ertlacker, a spokesman for FFG. “Rewarding them for their patience by releasing Marie Lambeau in a game with a title that shares many of the same words as Arkham Horror: The Card Game is a true joy for everyone here.”

“This smoky voiced maiden has previously only been enjoyed by a select few people who were able to afford a very expensive hard-cover book released two years ago,” Ertlacker continued. “With the release of Arkham Horror 3E, now everyone can enjoy playing as Marie Lambeau in a completely separate game.”

When asked when Lambeau would be released for the goddamn card game, which is what we asked in the first place, Ertlacker said they would probably release Lambeau in a few months as a playable character when Mansions of Madness: Mother’s Embrace comes out on PC in 2019.