Look, everyone. I know that I have no resources right now. And I know you all were looking forward to me using Uncage the Soul to put out this level 3 Shrivelling I’ve been sitting on for like five rounds now, so that I can finally do some damage to that Byakhee that’s literally eviscerating Daisy as we speak. But, listen, if I fail this Frozen In Fear one more time, I’m literally going to flip this table.

That’s why it’s time for me to commit Uncage the Soul for icons again.

This photo was taken during a happier time, when I was not committing Uncage the Soul for icons.

I know you all are confused right now. “Aren’t you a Mystic? How come you can’t pass a simple Will test? You have a Holy Rosary and everything.” Look, Finn. I know the concept of passing a Will test is foreign to you, but let me try to explain it. In order to pass this Will test, I need to not draw a -3 or worse. Do you know how many times I’ve drawn the -3? Five times, Finn. Five times. So excuse me if maybe my faith in this chaos bag has shattered to the point where I feel I absolutely must commit this Uncage the Soul, so I can maybe move fast enough to run away from the Organist again.

“But, why are you concerned about losing actions? Don’t you get bonus actions?” WOW, really smart point, let me just put out some doom in the middle of A Phantom of Truth and I’ll get right on that. That’ll definitely not ruin everything for everyone. Maybe if someone had shared their Faustian Bargain haul with me we wouldn’t be having this problem right now.

Do you really think I can kill this with no assets, Finn? Are you serious right now?

And I autofailed. Cthulhudamn it!