Doctors at Boston City Hospital were horrified yesterday upon the discovery of a shocking and potentially life-threatening result following a patient’s brain scan. “I’ve been a doctor for 20 years and I thought I had seen it all,” said Dr. Andrea Morris, “but this decklist for Seeker Tony inside this patient’s brain disturbed me like nothing else.”

The Tony Morgan decklist, which opted for Seeker cards in a clear sign of the patient’s severe brain damage, was immediately extracted from the patient’s mind and sent to a specialist for further examination. “It had Unearth the Ancients in it,” said Dr. Sandra Weatherbee. “I give this man 1, maybe 2 scenarios to live tops.”

“Frankly, I’m shocked he isn’t in a coma after just thinking about running Seeker Tony,” said Dr. Weatherbee, shaking her head in disapproval.

“At Boston City Hospital, we try to give every patient – even the stupid ones – the best chance of living a normal, healthy life,” said Dr. Morris. “This man is struggling today, and that is tragic. However, we hope that with rehabilitation through our Guardian and Survivor Recovery Program (GSRP), we can take these unfortunate Tony decks and give them hope for a resolution where they are doing something other than resigning because they can’t do anything useful.”

At press time, the unnamed patient was put on emergency life support after it was discovered he had planned to purchase Expose Weakness with his experience points.